1049: MS&R - 43

 While I was baffled by her coming , she on the other hand took the occurring of that thing she said about me without being puzzled and with immediate recognition and detection like someone watching the falling of something he had pushed toward such end. But, like how I do not know what made me suddenly leave my room and tell her that they had arranged a conspiracy on me and then the reaction of the relative who was staying with us at the time countered how what I said appears crazy accusation to me (POST 1000), it was I who chose on an occasion to behave loosely in front of her without knowing why, allowing her to detect that thing. Then I watched her internal conflict about my existence come to the outside like I could have never imagined. First she offered to go back to where I came from and bring me a wife. She had never before offered me that thing with recognition to my existence like she does it to the others. Beside being made on the go and not showing the same level of really wanting to do that, all other makings of such offer had to include that she bring her to me sixteen years old without missing saying that as if it is required by law. On the other hand according to her own admission, she was directed for the youngest girl in the family from which person3 married but she picked the oldest who is only three years younger than him. But for me it was following on that same age thing they had been doing to me to disregard my existence. Then she immediately stopped and it was unbelievable how she looked like switching to an evil character wanting to take advantage of the situation, and such offer have never been repeated again.

Just in case some think that there could have been some special infatuation toward the related person, there was non of that. All what she had indicated that much being against the self as the first aim and she still not only did not feel responsibility for me but took and celebrated the thing for herself.

By the way, one of them had never been seen praying since the late eighties, and for a muslim to do the daily prayer without being noticed by others living with him is probably unheard of even for a duration of just days (and I am being generous here). I am not citing that for itself but because it is supposedly big thing to her. Yet, I heard her sometimes asked about it (probably closer to twenty than ten years since then) and she responded saying like he says he prays, what business we have in that? Actually, I even never heard him or about him that he answers that affirmatively, but instead responds with a challenge saying Do you swear that I do not pray? I myself asked her about that twice and in both times she responded telling me about how she once opened the room door on him and found him in one of the positions related to doing a prayer. Notice how contrary to her effort to watch and detect that thing on me, here she did not even continue the checking to see if he was praying or not, and even though the position she mentioned is not that much associated with only doing a prayer.